Life is 50/50
Updated: Jan 21
Of course, we want to feel amazing, empowered and happy. That’s the goal, right? Ever wonder why you end up experiencing so much frustration, disappointment and uncertainty?
The Human Experience is All about Contrast and Opposition
It would be incredible if the human experience was all about being happy and feeling loving. How do we know this isn't the case? We can simply take a look at our own life. We experience positive and negative emotions everyday, whether we are at work or on a dream vacation.
What does 50/50 look like?
I am at a fantastic working retreat with 4 other life coaches and have an amazing productive morning. Now it's hour 5 and I'm stumped and so frustrated that I want to sprain my own ankle so I can quit what I am working on.
It's Christmas morning and I feel like I should be happy, but instead I'm feeling uncertainty and anxiety about how things will turn out.
We are in the heart of Disneyland, the happiest place on earth, and one of my daughters is having an epic melt down. I feel annoyed and powerless.
This also means it's no better "there" than "here"
There isn’t some arrival that will bring all the joy
If life is 50/50, it’s not all of a sudden going to be amazing when we finally get married. Just ask some one who is married and they will tell you, it’s still 50/50. Or we think how great it will be when we finally lose the weight. It will still be great and messy, fun and a downer.
This is why loving our lives right now is so genius. It means we are getting on board with contrast and opposition.
It means there is no rush, because there is no finish line
Why I love knowing this
It means everything is perfect, right here, right now. I can quit expecting only love when we are getting together as a family for supper and someone gets offended. Or we are vacationing on the Oregon Coast and the weather doesn't cooperate and the dog runs away. It will always be half great and half cruddy.
Getting on board with the 50/50 brings me peace. Instead of being all spun up about the drama, I can take a look at what I am actually feeling and see if I can get on board with that.